Right up near the top of the list of things that induce massive amounts of guilt in a mom is spending the night away from home. I’ve spent the vast majority of my daughter’s 7 and a half months on Earth feeling too angsty to even sleep in a different room than her, let alone out of the house.
But the fact that she’s not yet sleeping through the night coupled with my inherent laziness means I’ve been feeling like a zombie for quite some time now. My husband and I have been talking about the need to get away for months, but I’d been hesitant to bite the bullet. I have no shortage of doting babysitters, so that wasn’t the problem. Instead, I was plagued by questions like: What if something terrible happens? What if she misses me? What if she doesn’t miss me? What if she forgets who I am? What if I can’t enjoy myself?
But as her nighttime wake-ups put me deeper and deeper into sleep debt, I had to admit myself that a night away could be not just fun and relaxing but also crucial to my sanity.
So this past weekend Saturday, we finally did it. I spent hours packing her clothes, preparing her bottles, and picking out which toys should make the trip to grandma’s (which is one floor below our apartment, by the way). I kissed my little love goodbye several dozen times, demanded hourly text updates, and hit the road.
My heart was heavy as we set out, but it began to lift as it sunk in that I would have an entire day to do whatever the hell I wanted. I quickly began a to do list:
- Driving there nap
- Arrival nap
- Pre-dinner nap
- Post-dinner nap
- Before bed nap
- Scroll through hundred of cute pictures of baby girl, staring longingly
- Go to bed
I am happy to report that not only was I able to check off every item on my list, but I was also able to see a little bit of Philadelphia (remind me to google what the Liberty Bell’s deal is), eat some amazing food, and not change a single pooey diaper. Oh, and also spend some time with my husband.
It was glorious, and even though I missed my baby terribly, I felt so incredibly refreshed. The feeling began to wear off about an hour after I got home, but still. Progress.